Managing the Holiday Mental Load

By Lauren Bretscher, twin mama

The Holidays can be A LOT, yet they are one of the most magical times of the year.  If you are like me, I am just standing on my head hoping everyone stays healthy after a busy “sick season,” in my house.  This Fall has been rough.  I can’t say much more in fear of jinxing myself (IYKYK)! 

Hosting, visiting, cooking, baking with our littles, holiday events with the kids, company dinners, friend gatherings, shopping, knocking down the “nice” list, wrapping, decorating, honoring / creating traditions, and making memories.  While these all bring warmth to my heart (especially those last two), I have moments where this feels unmanageable, expensive, or overwhelming (like how I tend to overthink every gift)!  My family celebrates Christmas and with under two weeks to go, I try not to complain, but find ways to cope and slow down instead.  Time is precious and I want to be present. 

More recently, I am trying to slow down, taking on less, working hard to keep our routine up as best I can, and have many holidays dance offs with my kiddos. 

I don’t take on more than I can handle in one day.  I don’t want to be “burnt out,” shopping.  Instead, I am trying to shop little by little, person by person.  It feels more meaningful focusing on one person, placing thought into each gift.  I plan to have the same approach with wrapping. 

I’ve had to say ‘no’ to a few events and I’ve learned that’s OK.  For example, a few holiday get togethers have been proposed after school some days, and while I normally jump at the opportunity, I am trying to not take on more right now.  Insert dance parties.  My kids and I have spent more time together, at home.  One can dream these dance parties turn into a tradition!  I also keep my movement routine up.  I continue to take time for me, moving my body through my Pilates practice.  Taking time for yourself is so important.

My tips are simple.

·       Create a plan today.

·       Chip away at the plan starting tomorrow. 

·       Take time for you or just take a break from your plan!

·       Make a new list every few days.  Watch that list shrink!

·       ENJOY this time with your kiddos.  Say no if you have too. 

·       Have fun.  Do something adventurous or new – like a daily dance party!

Finally, talk about the things you’ll do as a family for the holidays. Let your children come up with some new ideas for holiday fun. Remember you are doing your best and everything always comes together.  Be proud of how hard you are working to make another year so memorable and special for your family. 

My last, but favorite holiday tip…

At the end of the season when you are packing away those decorations, make a list of the family traditions you can hold on to, such as cooking favorite meals, singing holiday songs, watching holiday movies, or putting up decorations then put it at the top of the box and put the lid on.  This is how traditions are made.  Next year when you open the box you’ll be reminded again.  And again…until it sticks. 

Happy Holidays!